Posted on

Rest: the key to RESToration

Have you ever felt like there were ping pong balls bouncing around in your mind? A thought here, and then boing, a thought there, and boing, boing, boing – scattered, random thoughts that are hard to harness in? That was me at the beginning of 2019. I had just finished up a busy, productive year in 2018, and ended up realizing that I had to figure out a way to slow myself down on the inside. The inside of my mind was busy writing to-do lists for myself, writing to-do lists for everyone in my family, and even writing to-do lists for the Lord when I would take the time to pray. We are on a roll, full steam ahead, making progress and crushing goals – this was the mantra I seemed to be operating in! Naturally, I’m wired to LOVE lists, and love the feeling of crossing items off the list – so rewarding and satisfying! I’m a go-getter with a high capacity to multi-task, and can easily slip into feeling security and value in what I have accomplished and conquered.

In early 2019, when I actually stopped and took a moment to zero in on my thoughts, realizing how ping-pongy they were inside, and seeing just how hard it was to be still and quiet and hear the voice of God as well as hear my own heart and thoughts beyond lists – I realized I needed help! I realized I had become disconnected from my heart and His heart. Psalms 46:10 says, “Be still and know that I am God.” But, how can you do that when the inside feels like a 3 year old who just consumed way too much sugar, bouncing off the walls, and being still seems so hard, if not impossible?

So, I did what I always do when I don’t know what the answer is: I asked the Lord.

Me: Lord, how do I slow the inside down? How do I fix this and get back to a place of peace and order in my thoughts, so that I can be better connected to You and to my own heart again, instead of only being driven by my to-do lists?

God: In rest, you will find RESToration.

Me: <groan> I stink at resting. I am so not good at it. Honestly, I don’t even think I truly know how to rest right now! I’m going to need a step by step plan for learning how to rest if this is going to work. Please give me your strategy for this!

And so, just like He promised He would do when we ask for wisdom and strategy, He delivered a personalized plan for me! This is what I felt Him direct me to do:

  • For the first 6 months of the year, every single day, pull away and go to your bedroom. Set the timer on your phone for 10 minutes. This will be what rest looks like for you as it grows in your heart. (Note: I started out with just 10 minutes… but, later on, as I got better at this <hello, discipline!> and started loving it, I increased the time and then found myself pulling away multiple times a day because it was just so wonderful)
  • ONLY think about how much I love you, how My affections are for you, and how you, Leah, delight Me… let MY love and affections for you start to transform and renew your mind. When your thoughts start to drift to other things during the 10 minutes, yank them back, and refocus on receiving My love and affections for you. (Note: you would not believe how hard this was for me to do in the beginning – 10 minutes is a long time to sit with one thought! When I first started this practice, I would only make it 2 or 3 minutes tops before my mind would drift to “I need to do this afterwards… or remember to tell this person such-and-such.” But, I learned to yank my thoughts back over and over again and refocus on leaning into His love for me, and it got easier over time to stay in that place for longer and longer amounts of time).
  • (After a few weeks of ONLY focusing on His love, the next step of instructions came). After you have spent the first few minutes of time focusing on My love and affections for you, then spend time AGREEING with Me. Believe about yourself all of those things that I am speaking over your heart, see yourself the way I see you – do you agree that you are My delight and have been made worthy of My love, that I’m crazy about you, and that you make Me smile? Do you believe that you are amazing, when I say that you are amazing? “We love because He first loved us. 1 John 4:19” (Note: FIRST comes His love for us, and that is what enables us to return that love back to Him!) To the degree that you receive My love for you and AGREE with it, is the measure that you will be able to release your love for ME! (Note: I realized that even though I want to love Him better, love Him more, offer Him everything I can possibly offer Him – I am capped off and limited to what I can offer Him by the degree of HOW MUCH I agree with His affections for me! This simple truth was worth pondering and caused me to put more value and attention in really receiving and believing His affections were for me and agreeing with how awesome He sees me, so that I have more to offer of love and affection back to Him!)
  • (Again, after a few weeks, the next step came). The pattern for rest is 1) Focus on and receive My love and affections for you, 2) Agree with them, and 3) Return and release your love back to Me! (Note: as time went on, I began to live from the place once again of knowing deep-down how loved I am, believing and agreeing with it, and spending the majority of my quiet time being able to release my affections and true worship back to Him! My lists were no longer in control of my mind, and my body/soul/spirit were back in alignment. I felt connected again to my own heart and to hearing the heart of the Father once again!)

And the cycle continues over and over, His love is showered on me, I agree with it as it lands on My heart, and then I release it back to Him. I faithfully did this every day for the first 6 months of 2019, and it changed me! Not only did this renew my mind, but I feel like it renewed me on all levels. I could feel a difference even physically, and I believe spending time in His presence even renews us on a cellular level. I’m stepping out a little on a limb here, but I will even admit that I could see a difference when I looked in the mirror. I started to look younger – like my skin was anti-aging! And, others noticed, too. I started getting compliments and questions about what skin products I was using, or when people would find out how old my kids were and did the math – they’d ask me about my age. It was happening so often that is was comical – I knew that this strategy He had given me was renewing me in body/soul/spirit. In His presence is the fullness of joy, which really is the best-kept secret of anti-aging! This rest – resting in His perfect, complete love for me – brought RESToration to my whole being.

There are a ton of really great resources out there that have to do with rest, dealing with anxiety, getting a healthier mental space: Dr. Caroline Leaf has wonderful, science-based books on how to rebuild healthy neuropathways, Brene Brown has so many wonderful books, and there are gobs of wonderful sermons and teachings from really anointed and wise teachers. There are also absolutely wonderful counselors, therapists, and doctors to assist with bringing you into a place to more easily receive healing and walk in health. I’m also honored to share in this blog my personal testimony of my own healing and restoration season. But, no thing, no book, no teaching or testimony, and no one can substitute first coming to The One who knows the intricacies of who you are, how you are made, and where you are at right now on the inside. Ask Him for a plan – He promises to help you, and He promises to give you wisdom when you need it! So, here is the main point of this blog: He has a very specific, personalized strategy for EVERY issue in your life, in every season. He can give you true rest. He can give you life-changing, long-lasting true restoration!

Looking back, I can’t really express how thankful I am that I was able to finally learn how to rest, that I took the time (although 6 months seemed like so long to me at the beginning of it!), and that since then, I’ve been able to maintain a lifestyle of rest on the inside. The season changed me in so many deep ways, and has allowed me to receive from the Lord more easily. I’m also extremely grateful to be in the midst of this quarantine time living out of a place of true inner rest. This peace guards my heart and mind, and anchors me to the Hope, safe and secure.

Posted on

Remember the Hope

Does the beginning of 2020 seem like eons ago? It may have been just 3 months ago, but, wow, has a lot happened in that time… Did you start this new year of 2020 out strong, full of hope and anticipation, only to have slammed on the brakes with everything coming to a crashing halt in light of what is happening in the world? What in the actual world…

As you can read about in my January blog post, I absolutely love New Years and the anticipation of a brand-new year ahead. Like many people, it is a tradition of mine to pray and ask the Lord for a “word” for the New Year – kind of like a theme of what I’m going to be growing in and working on in the new season. I was totally expecting Him to speak the word “vision,” or “focus,” or “clarity,” just because of the obvious 20/20 cliché. This word was practically handed over to us all on a silver platter, right? Plus, I had heard about a lot of other people declaring that over the new year, both personally or for the corporate church at large. Wouldn’t He say the same thing to me? I mean, having a clearer vision for your path sounds awesome! Sign me up!

The Word of the Year (for me!)

But, nope. That is not what He spoke to my heart. The word He gave me for 2020 was: courage. <insert heart a little deflated, and a really, God?> I’m going to admit: I wasn’t very pleased to hear that… my first thought was why would I need courage unless something potentially scary or risky was going to happen that You were going to call me to do – can I trade this in for a new word that is more fun and safe? I’m pretty comfy with this life, and not lookin’ to change things up… I got the butterflies all up in my stomach going in to 2020. However, I calmed myself down by remembering His goodness in the past, focusing on the fact that He is always with me, and that I don’t ever need to be afraid of my future – even if there are challenges ahead. < See January post >

Interpretation

At the time, I interpreted this word from Him to mean He was going to call me to be more vulnerable, unhidden, and it was going to be a year of “stepping out” more. I was given the opportunity to speak at three different churches since 2020 started, and that took some courage. Additionally, this blog has taken a TON of courage for me – flinging wide open the doors of your heart for this here world-wide-web to see and judge me isn’t the most fun thing in the world for me… As I look back on my very narrow interpretation about what this word “courage for 2020” meant, I can see that my interpretation of the application of the word was very introspective, and all about me. However, now I can see that this word is SO much bigger than little ole me – which is why I felt led to write and share this very personal treasure of mine. I pray that it encourages you in this uncertain time!

My Journal Entry: 1/17/20

As if writing this blog wasn’t vulnerable enough for me (ahem, hello courage!), I’d like to share with you my journal entry I wrote back in January when I was spending time praying about this word from the Lord and asking Him to share with me more about it. In light of everything that has transpired in the country/world since I wrote this down, I am in awe of this sweet gift I can look back on, hold onto, and I want to share it with you. This is what I wrote on January 17th, according to how I heard Him speak to my heart:

“cOURage : Do you see the word inside of courage? OUR – it is us, together! Courage is a “we-thing.” I am with you always, God Immanuel. It’s not just your life, your dreams, and your actions – it’s ours to do together. Partners. Take heart. Have courage. We are doing this together.

Hold your peace. Stay steady. Keep your eyes focused on me. Straight on… I’ve got your back. It’s covered – your backside is not exposed or uncovered – My wings are covering you. There’s new sandals/shoes of peace for your feet – for walking in a spirit of peace and restoration and the ministry of reconciliation. I’m strengthening your legs to stand firm – like pillars that can’t be moved. There is strength, power, and faith to hold fast and stay steady; arms that reach towards me with constant hunger for more of Me, and hands that are tender and compassionate – and that only pick up what I tell them to pick up, and are OK with letting things go that need to be released. You’ll have shoulders that carry the authority I place on them with grace and dignity and confidence; and thoughts that are pure and holy, and fixed on things above.

This year sets the stage. Be kind to yourself. Continue to practice rest. Sow good seeds this year. Go slow. Slow yourself down. Be at peace.”

He is unchanging

So, did you enter into 2020 with a word or a phrase that you felt would be the focus of the year? I just want to shout out to everyone – these circumstances we are now in does NOT void out that word or that dream/promise you were believing for! If your word had to do with vision or clarity, perhaps He will give you creative vision for how to recover from COVID’s impact on your life. Maybe your clarity word has to do with getting a healthier perspective on what matters most in life, and making some changes to support your clear, renewed priorities…

Remember your word over 2020. Go back to it again and revisit it. This word is still relevant to you in THIS year! Perhaps this word will end up being a necessary tool and resource for you amidst the crisis, or in recovering from the crisis later this year. Your interpretation of what you thought your word might mean or what it may look like this year may need to be tweaked – just like mine did. But, His words – just like His character – are unchanging. They are not bound to circumstances. They don’t come true for us according to how things are going around us. The Truth is still the truth. How we apply the truth or the lens by which we see the truth may need adjusted, but His word is unfailing and it will accomplish ALL that it was sent forth to do.

Feeling hopeless about the future of 2020 and the ramifications of what COVID19 is going to have on life as we knew it? Please go read my January blog post, and consider following that method I wrote about regarding how to re-align your thoughts with hope.

I may not fully know right now the full extent of just how much I’m going to need that “courage” word this year. There are still uncertainties ahead for all of us… but, I know the One who will be with me always, giving me cOURage, because it is a “we-thing.” He holds my peace and makes me steady. He quiets my thoughts and takes away any fear or anxiety. He is my rest. I’m praying especially for courage right now for you and your family!

There are gobs of scriptures about courage… Here are just a few from The Passion Translation:

“Don’t give up; don’t be impatient; be entwined as one with the Lord, Be brave and courageous, and never lose hope. Yes, keep on waiting – for He will never disappoint you!” Psalms 27:14 TPT

“We have great endurance in hardships and in persecutions. We don’t lose courage in a time of stress and calamity” 2 Corinth 6:4 TPT

“So cheer up! Take courage all you who love Him. Wait for Him to break through for you, all who trust in Him!” Ps. 31:24

“At the very moment I called out to you, You answered me! You strengthened me deep within my soul and breathed fresh courage into me.” Ps. 138:3

“Remember to stay alert and hold firmly to all that you believe. Be mighty and full of courage.” 1 Corinth 16:13

“And everything I’ve taught you is so that the peace which is in Me will be in you and will give you great confidence as you rest in Me. For in this unbelieving world you will experience trouble and sorrows, but you must be courageous, for I have overcome the world!” John 16:33 TPT

“I leave the gift of peace with you – my peace. Not the kind of fragile peace given by the world, but my perfect peace. Don’t yield to fear or be troubled in your hearts – instead, be courageous!” John 14:27 TPT

Posted on

Top Three Treasures

The text from a dear friend read, “Welcome to the parents with adult children club!”

My first-born turned 18 on Valentine’s Day, and although I knew this day would come, it felt a little strange reading those words. She is officially an adult! We made it! I didn’t end up in jail or the hospital, even though some of my thoughts along the way could have easily landed me there… and wow! Look at her. She is amazing – not perfect, of course, but I can look at her and say, “Yep, I’m really proud of who you are and have grown into.”

… which led me to my next thought: How exactly did this happen? Did I do this? How much of this creation, this brand-new adult, is because of me and how much of it is because of God and this-is-just-the-way-He-made-her, and she just makes me look good being her Mother?

And, so I pondered and mulled it over and over, reflecting back over her childhood and remembering the highlights of so many lessons learned along the way. I’d like to share with you my top THREE parenting treasures I’ve received from being Callie’s Mom.

#1 : My Parenting Life-Verse

It didn’t take long for us to realize that we had produced a “not-normal” child. She said her first words and sentences super early, and knew all of her letters and the sounds they made by 1 year of age. Due to her photographic memory, she had learned to read as a toddler. But, as smart as she was, this kid was FULL OF FIRE, and the most strong-willed, difficult child I had ever had to be around in my life. (Think Enneagram 8 on steroids and you have little kid Callie). Why is it that the smart ones are often the most challenging?! Being first-time parents to a “normal” child is hard enough, and as much as I truly loved her, it was beyond exhausting parenting this child. I found myself regularly crying, ”Why, God? Whyyyyyy? I can’t do this. This isn’t what I signed up for. How will I make it through 18 long years of this?”

I remember the exact moment when, through tears, I angrily cried out to the Lord, “HELP! You created this child, and You’re the one that gave her to me. You absolutely HAVE to give me something to hold on to, or I’ll never make it to the finish line.” And I felt His peace wash over me and heard His gentle voice so clearly say to me:

“Leah, this is your parenting verse. Hang onto it closely. Always come back to it. Never forget it. It holds the keys for you:

“Let us not grow weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” ~ Galatians 6:9, NIV”

How many times through the years have I come back to this verse, over and over again – if we do not give up, IF we do not give up. Day in and day out, whether your kid is treating you well or not, don’t get so tired that you stop doing good, don’t forget that at the proper time (later on down the road from now) you are going to reap a harvest – just as long as you don’t give up. You may get tired, you may feel beat up, you may need to catch your breath, but you get back in there and keep at it because your harvest is coming.

The Passion Translation says it like this: “And don’t allow yourselves to be weary or disheartened in planting good seeds, for the season of reaping the wonderful harvest you’ve planted is coming!”

Did I ever question whether the promise in this verse would actually work out, when circumstances were screaming otherwise? Yep. Did I ever think “Gosh, I’m not sure how this kid is going to turn out!” Oh yes, I did – many, many times! But, let me tell you, at the end of the 18 years of my daughter’s childhood, I can shout out loud that this verse is absolutely TRUE! You can put all your chips in on this verse. It worked! And, it is still working… There will be moments where the fulfillment of this verse seems impossible, or at least impossibly far out-of-reach, but if you pull this verse out even in your frustration, even in your pain, no matter what the circumstances are telling you in the moment – you’ll have a weapon to fight with, something to hold onto, the glimmer of Living Hope when your faith is weak.

It felt slow-going for several years, but eventually I started seeing some signs of harvest here and there as she got older. It was so exciting to see the first signs of fruit blossoming, and I remember a word of encouragement the Lord spoke to me as I was dead-heading my flower boxes in the Springtime. He said to me, “Leah, celebrate and enjoy these flowers you are seeing in her life, but don’t forget to diligently tend the garden – come through on a regular basis and get rid of the dead-heads so that there’s room for even more flowers to grow and flourish!” I’ve always remembered that, and have come back to the Parenting Life-Verse’s message: keep at it and don’t give up when things are hard, but ALSO keep at it and don’t give up (or become lazy) when things are good and easy! That is the key! The Parenting Life-Verse applies in every season and this truth is not based on the performance of your child. This powerful verse is the most important, valuable parenting advice I have ever been given!

#2 : Keep Your Love ON

Establishing and maintaining a heart-to-heart connection with our child at all times, especially in the hormonal, pre-teen years, seemed to take up the bulk of our parenting energy. Man, is that ever HARD WORK. We’ve found that everything is connected to, and flows out of, relationship. I would confidently say that THIS aspect of parenting is where we put the most attention and energy into.

Admittedly, my husband is naturally better at this than me. He has helped me to learn how to pause, take a slow breath in the heat of the moment, and be “quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.” (James 1:19). When sass and disrespect came at me, it was so hard to not throw it right back. I failed so many times, but developed skill in this over time through perseverance, patience, and encouragement to keep at it. When my heart wanted to walk away, to put distance between me and the pain, to build up a wall of protection, to throw in the towel of defeat, my husband would say “when you want to push away, that’s when you need to pull them in the most.” When they’re acting their ugliest is when they need to see your love for them the most.

The saying “Hurt people usually hurt people” is easy to see on display when it comes to kids, and taking out their pain or frustration on your family is usually the normal, standard procedure. But, it is “His kindness that leads us to repentance.” (Romans 2:4). Love is so powerful. As The Passion Translation says, “Respond gently when you are confronted and you’ll defuse the rage of another. Responding with sharp, cutting words will only make it worse.” (Prov. 15:1). It is easy to love our kids when they are being nice to us, but the real test of love is when they are treating us poorly, and we still reach out with love, kindness and compassion. Easier said than done, but possible through God’s grace. When I saw my kids try to pull away from me, instead of pulling away myself, too, I realized that THAT was the time when I needed to pursue them in relationship all the more. They now know deep down in their being that their parents will always pursue them and their heart-to-heart connection in relationship with them.

I can’t stress enough how important it is to be a trustworthy, safe place for your child’s heart: a place where they know they will not be mocked, embarrassed, or criticized. You are building a safe zone where they know they will be secure in your love, championed, and protected.

Please know that I’m not advocating you let your child walk all over you, or let them treat you like dirt and “get away with it.” But, working on building a healthy relationship that includes healthy communication, with expectations and boundaries in place, is the hard work that has great rewards – for them and for you! Two great books that helped us learn these important skills are both by Danny Silk: “Loving Our Kids on Purpose,” and “Keep Your Love On.” I highly recommend reading both of them!

#3 : Trust His Timing

In a season of frustration, I remember saying to the Lord, “When are you going to change her? She is a teenager and will leave my house in a few years, and I really want to see “xyz” happen in her before she leaves. I’ve worked hard, and I kinda feel like I deserve to see this happen! You are running out of time, God! Please hurry it up!” His very patient, gracious response to me was this:

“Leah, remember your 20s? Remember all of the things I did in your life then? Remember all of the new things I showed you, the ways I softened your heart and taught you and grew you? That was good…. (I paused & considered this)…. Remember your 30s? Remember the things I challenged you with? The areas of your heart I purified? The uncomfortable lessons you learned and the new revelations you came to know and understand? That was good…. (I paused & considered this). You see, there are appointed times for Callie’s life, too. There are seasons in her life that are marked and waiting for the perfect time to learn and grow in some of very lessons you are asking me to teach her. Now she could learn some of these lessons now, sure, but they won’t take root and have the long-lasting, deep impact like they would if she were to have them taught by ME in the APPOINTED SEASON I’ve already planned for her. So, trust my timing for her life. Your job is not to produce a perfect child at the end of this parenting journey. I never asked you to give me a finished product when she turns into an adult. Your job is to diligently tend the garden in the season I’ve entrusted you with. It is not your job to produce the fruit – it’s mine. Enjoy the fruit you see, but know that there is so much more fruit that’ll continue to spring up over her lifetime – and I AM faithful to complete ALL that I have started in her!”

This conversation with the Lord gave me such freedom and peace. I have rehearsed His words to me in moments of discouragement; I have rehearsed these words in moments of bursting pride looking at how amazing she is. He is so faithful, and worthy of all of my trust. This parenting season is an honor and a gift (extremely hard at times, of course), but a profound partnership with the Master Gardener.

What, now?

As we sat down with her at her favorite restaurant on her Birthday, celebrating this big milestone, we took some time to remember her childhood journey: the funny times, the hard times, the great times, the phases she went through, her stories and memories – we thanked her for being our guinea pig child, teaching us all kinds of lessons. But, the greatest joy for me that night was when I said to her, “Thank you for trusting us with your heart. You’ve chosen relationship with us, over and over, and we don’t take that for granted. Your heart is precious to us, and you have shared it with us… But, I also want to thank you for being trustworthy with our hearts. We have given you ours, and you haven’t broken them. You could have. You could have made different choices plenty of times, but you valued our hearts and our relationship.” And then we toasted the end of one chapter and the beginning of a new one! No matter what the future holds, we all know that our connection is solid, trustworthy, and that is one of the best Harvest gifts a Mother can have.

So, now we enter the stage of being parents to adult children: a brand new season that will be full of new challenges, new grace, and new revelations. There is such sweet fulfillment in knowing that we are entering this season building onto a firm foundation that has been laid. The beautiful Harvest that was promised is here, and will keep producing fruit for generations to come! He is faithful to His Word.

A final note: my daughter read and gave me permission before I posted this, in keeping with our commitment to honor each other at all times.

Posted on

Hope for the New Year

My absolute fav:

I know a lot of people’s favorite holiday is Christmas. Many will say that Thanksgiving is their favorite. But, I’m always given curious looks when I share with people that New Year’s is my absolute favorite holiday of the year. My eyes light up and I get almost giddy with excitement, anticipating the turning of the calendar! What surprises are waiting for us in the new year, just around the corner – out of our sight now, but already carefully planned out waiting for the appointed time to pop out of nowhere. As we go about daily life – what good things will sweep us off our feet in this new chapter of life?

When people ask me, “Why? Why would New Year’s be your favorite holiday? Aren’t you a Christian? Shouldn’t your favorite be a religious holiday or something?”

My response has usually been, “Oh, but it IS sort of a religious holiday to me! I’m never more filled with hope and faith than I am at New Year’s. I’m filled with an anything-is-possible outlook and a sense that I’m about to dig into a brand new chapter of a great book, and I can’t wait to gobble it up and find out what twists and turns will happen next…. Plus, this enneagram 1w2 loves lists, goals, and fresh starts!”

I had a friend challenge me one year, by sharing with me that it is hard for her to understand my enthusiasm and hope that gets supercharged at this time of the year, every year. She asked me, “Isn’t January 1st just like any other day? It just marks the end of the holidays and the return to normal routine. Nothing really changes when we flip the calendar into a new year. It is just another regular day. What makes it so special? Shouldn’t you have just as much hope and faith in April or July or October as you do now in January?”

… which led me on a journey of pondering why? Why is it that I’m SO EXCITED every time New Year’s comes around? IS there something special about this particular time of year that makes it easier to deep-down truly believe His goodness is following me (Ps 23:6), He has plans to prosper me (Jer 29:11), and that I don’t have to fear the future but can laugh at the days to come (Prov 31:25)?

WHY?

So, I began to pray and ask the Lord another one of my “why” questions, and guess what?! He showed me that actually, yes… Yes, there is a reason why it is easier to be hope-filled at this time of year! The first thing that He showed me was simply pointing out that we just spent an entire month focused on Immanuel, God with us. We have sung it in our Christmas carols, we have driven past the nativity scenes in yards and churches declaring that He came, and He is here! Our entire culture has been saying it, focused on it (whether consciously or subconsciously), marinating on the truth: Immanuel, which literally means God is WITH us. Immanuel, God is WITH us. He is WITH us. Marinating on that, and soaking in it has got to increase your hope and faith, knowing that as you step into a new chapter, He is WITH you. No matter what comes your way. We have been building up our faith muscle for a full month, without even realizing it! I can face tomorrow because I know (more than any other time of the year because I’ve been singing it and saying it for an entire month) that Immanuel is WITH me, and I’m not facing the unknown alone. Billions of people have been celebrating this fact, shouting out: He is here! He is with us! Gosh, no wonder I’m so full of faith by the time January comes!

But then… it gets even better! He began to show me that New Year’s is very much connected to the entire holiday season in a much greater, significant way than many of us realize! I heard Him whisper to my heart, “I am the One who was, the One who is, and the One who is to come!”

3 Holidays: paralleling WHO He is – in the past/present/future

Thanksgiving: the holiday where we take time to look behind us, to reflect on our blessings, to remember the year we are wrapping up and give our thanks for His faithfulness. He is the God of the past, worthy of celebrating! The One who was…

Christmas: the holiday where we declare He is Immanuel, God with us. He was sent to us, and has restored relationship with mankind so that we are no longer separated, but now are living in this very moment in communion with a God who never leaves us or forsakes us, and is so close, so very near at all times – our very present help. He is the God of the present, worthy of celebrating! The One who is…

New Year’s: the holiday where we look into the future boldly, without fear, full of hope and promise – because we first spent time remembering and rehearsing His goodness and faithfulness to us in our past, and then we spent time remembering and rehearsing His nearness to us now, His promise to always be with us, closer than close… it is because we have spent time reflecting on Him in our past and Him in our present that we can fully celebrate the God of the future, who is worthy of celebrating! The One who is to come…

Celebrate ALL of Him!

By the time January 1st hits, many of us are tired and partied out from the Holidays, and are ready to put them behind us and get on with life! But, I’d like to challenge you with this: if you cut short the New Year’s celebration, then you are missing out on celebrating ALL of who God is (and wants to be) in your life! We spend weeks prepping for Thanksgiving and focusing the entire month of November on being grateful. We spend almost the entire month of December celebrating Christmas. Yet, New Years is almost skipped over. What if we spent the entire month of January celebrating who God is in the future? What if we thanked Him and worshiped Him for all the things He is going to do this year, all of the ways He is going to grow your heart and character this year, all of the new revelations He is going to teach you and challenge you in, the provision and faithfulness He already has laid out for you, the plans He has to prosper you and give you a hope (that doesn’t let go) and a good future… Do you think if you spent an entire month celebrating the God of the future, it would impact how your new year unfolded? I’m thinking yes!

Application

This is kind of a stretch, but I also was thinking in a bigger picture sense about The Bible, and how it is laid out… One of the main characteristics of The Old Testament is that it is full of stories of His faithfulness in the past, and gives us hope for the future. One of the main characteristics of The New Testament is that it tells of God being with us in the present, and gives us hope for the future. As Christians, if we stop right there and our faith journey is only just about receiving the Old Testament and the New Testament, without looking and applying it towards our future – then, we are missing it! A crucial part of our Christianity walk is not found in the Bible – it is in the future! We have hope in things that are still yet to come! The Bible tells us some clues as to what will happen, and certainly the book of Revelation gives some broad strokes of what is to come. But, we hold in our living hearts the hope and promise that He is coming again, that He will make wrong things right, that we will have eternal life with Him – we grasp onto who He is in future – it is the evidence of our believing.

Feeling hopeless instead of hopeful?

If you are having a hard time being expectant and hopeful of this new year, can I offer a suggestion? Go back and start the cycle again. First, spend time meditating on Him in your past. Rehearse His goodness that you’ve seen towards you. Second, spend time meditating on Him being WITH you, closer than close. Spend as much time as you need in those first two steps, until you feel soaked through. Then, face your future knowing deep down that He is faithful and that He is with you. It is from that place, that you will be able to hold His hand tightly, find true courage and take your hope-filled steps with Him into your bright future!

You never know what GOOD things are waiting for you, just around the corner!

Posted on

Storyteller

I have stories to tell.

Some stories have happy, tidied, trim, and clean, or revelation-filled endings to them. Some stories are of pain and struggle and wrestling.

Many other stories are still in process, perhaps in the middle of the chapter, and I’m curiously waiting to see just how they will end.

These are my stories, filled with carefully crafted pages, plot twists, questions and <sometimes> answers, and a never-ending, always-pursuing, faithful-forever-Friend who invites me into THE MORE.

We were created to be storytellers. We were created to give to one another. To exchange. To pass on our stories. To cross-pollinate our ideas, and to encourage one another by sharing our experiences and our thoughts.

Last summer while in the midst of a worship service, God spoke to me by showing me a picture. It was of a volume dial – like the kind you’d find on an old school radio (or jam box, I’m showing my age!). He said to me, “It is time to turn the volume up, Leah. Your voice needs to be heard. You’ve been quiet for long enough.”

You see, the Lord asked me to write a blog several years ago. That’s right, you read that correctly – years ago. I’ve been having a rather looooong discussion with Him about why it wasn’t a very good idea. I’ve had lots of legitimately GOOD reasons why it wasn’t necessary. In fact, I even sort of half-obeyed Him (you know about those “half-obedience” kind of things, right?) by what’s called “blogging in my head.” This means I would write a blog (most of the time in the shower – which is my quiet, happy place where I can hear myself think). I’d write it, and read it through. I’d say to myself, “Wow, Leah! That’s so good! Mm-hmm. I’m going to chew on that some more…” And then I’d talk to Jesus about it, and I felt like we’d go back and forth some about what I wrote. It was our little blog we could talk about and discuss together. It was safe. He knew my heart. He knew what I meant, and I didn’t have to worry about Him misinterpreting my words. And, anyway, I was still “writing the blog,” just not sharing it with the entire world wide web. What does it matter if it’s private or public, I’d say… Yet, He still pressed the matter with me. He would ask me, “Why? What are you afraid of?” in His always kind and sincere but firm voice. And, then I would realize a fear, and that would lead to a season of working through an issue in my heart. This went on and on and on… YEARS, I tell you what! It has been a long conversation we’ve been having. We worked through lots of fears, and then a season where I just plain ole procrastinated because of “good excuses” rather than fears… I worked through a long list of those and that bought me even more time of putting it off because, I mean, I’m a homeschooling Mom of 4 girls, and I’ve got hormones flying everywhere in this house and we are SO very busy, etc, etc… Honestly, I think that I thought if I stalled long enough maybe He’d just kinda give up on the idea and do whatever He needed to do another way. He is resourceful and creative, right? Aren’t I so funny?!?!

I felt His big ole thumb pressing down on this blog thing AGAIN, and then I said in a sort of whiney, temper tantrum voice, “Why? Why do you want me to do this so bad? Why won’t you just Let.It.Go?” And, you know what He said to me?

“Because I love you too much to let it go. Because this blog is for your healing. This blog is for you to step into greater wholeness. This blog is for your health. This blog is for your breakthrough. Do this for yourself, not for anyone else. Love yourself enough to do this.”

And, so, here we are… I’m not exaggerating when I tell you it has been a long road to get to this point. He has done so many layers of healing to get me right here, right now. His patience with me is mind-blowing. His tenderness with my heart moves me to tears. His relentless pursuit takes my breath away.

I have stories to tell. They’re my stories, and they’re stories of His faithfulness through it all. I hope that by reading, you will be able to relate and find some things to chew on – perhaps to cause you to pause and evaluate, or perhaps to inspire you to share your story, too.

Steffany Gretzinger’s Come out of Hiding:

Morgan Harper Nichols’ Storyteller (with Jamie Grace):

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xID_t–BrqE